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Welcome to my website: all my stories hanging out in one small space like a kitchen full of misfits at a party

‘Rebecca wasn’t used to seeing Junie with enlarged pupils. When she comforted Junie after a nightmare, she always flicked on the big light and her daughter’s pupils shrank back to innocent dots. These neon-tinged pools suggested newfound wisdom, enhanced powers of perception.’

From ‘The Fanishing Ones’ in Bear Creek Gazette (May, 2022)
Image by Stuart Buck, Editor Bear Creek Gazette

‘She keeps her charity shops on a separate rotation to her epic bar crawl. It’s a big city; she never runs out of options. She is Harriet or Tamsin, sometimes Zara. Never Anna, despite its classlessness. She sprays on her name like expensive perfume.’

From ‘Sometimes Anna on her days off’ in Virtual Zine (Feb, 2022)
Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

‘Reflect that you have too much stuff for your children to make sense of should you die too soon to guide them through the mushrooming chaos of the Anthropocene. Recognise that your home is just another faulty unit in the unsustainable global system of shitty shitty stuff.’

From ‘Packing up the shit’ in Idle Ink (Feb, 2022
Photo by Dexter Fernandes on Pexels.com

‘They’d both had eyes for Danny – Danny Boy, Dan the Man – but Danny had only had eyes for assorted white powders. Just chill the hell out, lads, yer? he’d slur from the sofa, as arguments flamed around him.’

From ‘Upholstered Cumulus’ at Reflex Fiction (Feb, 2022)
Photo by Charlotte May on Pexels.com

‘Have you tried the obvious things? Cold showers, a big plate of pasta after nine-thirty? Switching your evening tipple for a warm milky drink?’

From ‘Occasional horniness will cost you, dear: an imagined conversation with my doctor in 2025’ in Little Old Lady Comedy (Dec, 2021)
Photo by cottonbro on Pexels.com

‘Gemma looked out the window and saw an Easyjet ad for £24.99 flights to Ibiza. In the other direction Burger King was promoting a £1.99 Whopper Deal. Her stomach rumbled and her mind emptied, as if shaking off the heft of its contents.’

From ‘Gem’s final tour in the world-saving vanguard’ in Punk Noir Magazine (Nov, 2021)
Photo by Steve Johnson on Pexels.com

‘All was progressing well until the nod-based choreography kicked in: nod to the left, nod to the front, nod to the right in glorious synchrony. Yes? No. I went the wrong way and was committed to alternate nose-to-nosing with a wide-eyed Mel and a po-faced Tonya Reynard.’

From ‘Mind the Puddle, Duck’ in Funny Pearls (Oct, 2021)

Photo by Monica Silvestre on Pexels.com

Strange to go against the flow, to squeeze through bodies hell-bent on bagging seats aboard a train going nowhere. Mad to abandon scores of sweaty commuters for-fuck’s-saking in stifling carriages.’

From ‘Calling at: Pharmacy, Florist, and Off-Licence only’ in 100 Word Story (Sept, 2021)
Photo by Yoss Traore on Pexels.com

‘Terry noticed her rolling side-to-side, wafting notes of strong white cider and stale tobacco smoke towards him. She seemed to be scrutinising the skyline, perhaps trying to return it to horizontal, as if she were a human spirit level.’

From ‘A Nice Sit Down and a Bit of What You Fancy’ in Truffle (Sept, 2021)
Photo by Lucy Goldring

‘After we’d arrived at the baths and checked the lifeguard rota, we got Dextro Energy out the vending machine. Four tablets at once delivers maximum tingle without the rabid squirrel look. You don’t want to go above five, trust me.’

From ‘Adult Lane Swimming’ in Northern Gravy (Sept, 2021)
Photo by Jonathan Borba on Pexels.com

‘Your two main tribes were the people who treated it like a last all-you-can-eat supper versus your cagey hoarders. The only people making sense were the old school-strike-for-climate lot. When I decided their Co-op Coms were the way forward it was too late.’

From ‘Scarce as Hen’s Teeth and Pot Luck Noods’ in Idle Ink (Sept, 2021)

Photo by Zachary DeBottis on Pexels.com

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